I’m meant to be sleeping right now as I have a meeting this morning. I did go to bed early and actually fell asleep, which was good, except when I woke up around 1:15. I am wide awake and have a lot running through my mind at the minute.
Mainly, things coming up but one of those things is a new dog. The waiting game is tough for everyone and I know most people have to play it between guide dogs, but finding the not knowing when so hard right now. If I’m honest, as much as I think our way of matching is excellent, waiting for the right match is a hard pill to swallow.
Don’t get me wrong, I know it has to be a good match and I’m all for the matching system we have here in the Uk, but missing having a four legged guide.
I have a crazy few weeks coming up, and I won’t deny the mobility is heavily on my mind at the moment, which makes the desire for a dog that much greater.
I hear people tell me, you’re a good cane user, you shouldn’t be bothered and you can get on just fine without a pooch but the truth is, I like trusting an animal to help me get around. I like not having to constantly think like I do when using the cane. I just prefer a dog.
It’s looking more likely that guide number two won’t appear until 2014 now. I just hope it’s at the beginning of the year, at least the first half of it.
I’m also thinking that I hope my commitment to the things I’m signing myself up for are good for me and I can dedicate myself to them.
Moving out is also heavily on my mind. I know, without a job, it’d be hard but I’m desperate to have my own little place. I love my family but feel the need to spread my wings.
Who knows what next year will bring? I just hope the next six weeks are positive ones and if so, they lead to more positive things for the new year. I’ll put my all in but I just ask for a bit of a chance.
I need to build my skills up and that is something I’ll be discussing in a few hours. I think I know what they are. I just feel so inferior to people even younger than me. My experience with work is so limited, if not non existent and it is making me feel so much like a third class citizen.
Please, everyone fingers tightly crossed.