I now Know I Definitely Don’t Want Babies

If there was ever a surer thing than me not wanting children, it was only concluded today when I was holding my three months old nephew and announced to my mum that I thought he was wet. nostrilsAs it turned out, as I balanced him on my lap, feeling my heart race with the nervousness of someone who does not want to be peed or shit on, mum undid his nappy and announced he’d done a pooh. Gee, mum, I didn’t know that, for as soon as you untied that nappy, a shocking smell shot up to my just clearing nostrils.

As most of you know, I’ve had sinus issues recently but by God could I smell that.

I have a dog and clean up after him every day without issue, I also walk into horses’ stables and pass muck heaps on a regular basis and none of those smells bring the bile to my throat like baby pooh does. So I think leaving reproducing to the rest of the population will do me just fine. Never again do I want to smell that horrible stuff. What the hell do three months old babies eat to make their faeces smell so vile and putrid? Ugh!!!!

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